Coaching in three difficult situations
Step 1 / 4·Coaching someone who isn't meeting expectations
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Learning objectives — after this module you will:
- Coach an underperformer without turning it into a reprimand
- Coach a strong performer who has plateaued
- Handle defensiveness or non-cooperation in coaching
Coaching someone who isn't meeting expectations
Separate coaching from discipline.
This is the easiest situation to get wrong. The manager opens in a coaching tone ('how do you feel this month went?') while already holding a conclusion. The employee senses the falseness immediately — and the conversation ends up worse than plain speaking would have been.
The principle: SEPARATE the two. If you need to communicate that performance is short, say that FIRST — with specific data. Only once you both agree on the reality do you switch into coaching to find the fix.
Two ways to open a performance conversation
Fake coaching
“'How do you think you did this month?' (while you've already concluded it fell short and intend to steer them there)”
They recognise the trap instantly. They either get defensive or run themselves down to guess your view — neither produces a real conversation.
Straight, then coach
“'I want to talk about this quarter's target. The goal was 20, we hit 13 — that gap concerns me. I want your perspective: what do you think led to that?'”
The facts are on the table with no trap. The question that follows is a real one — and they can answer honestly because they aren't guessing your view.
Don't use coaching to dodge the hard part
Some managers use coaching to avoid saying plainly that performance is short, hoping the employee will realise it themselves. This almost always fails: they leave without understanding how serious it is, then are blindsided by a low rating. Clarity is a form of respect.
Key takeaway: State the reality with data FIRST, agree the gap, THEN coach — never use coaching to dodge the hard part.